Competing or completing?

A single vleiloerie (Burchell’s coucal) piped lyrically from somewhere in the undergrowth. The rain bird, they call it. I was in Plettenberg Bay for a week and it was logical to be up with the sun before 5 am. That first day, jogging on the verge of the marsh behind the dunes of the Robberg beaches, I felt a stirring in my heart as the vleiloerie’s song followed me along the foot path.

The next day, I heard it again. On day three, a flash of chocolate brown, cream and black flitted across the gravel road ahead of me. The vleiloerie’s ungainly flight ended in the reeds where he proceeded to hop into a new hiding place from which he would warble triumphantly. It was music to my ears. Gulping deep breaths of salty air mixed with the organic, damp smell of the marsh, I felt energised. I picked up my pace. On day four, I slowed my pace to catch my breath before crossing the wooden walkway leading to the tar road inland. Suddenly, a duet of vleiloeries called. I found myself wondering: are they competing with each other or are they completing each other’s sentences? It sounded more like the latter. I know that’s anthropomorphic, but as I jogged on, I was deep in thought.

Competing fiercely?

Yes, competition exists. It is in our very core to strive for a greater degree of excellence or service or skill or whatever it is that arouses our passion to perform. And we tend to compete fiercely with our rivals. But, at the end of the day, nothing beats the satisfaction of overcoming that within ourselves that needs completion and supporting others as they complete their own challenges. That morning, shuffling up the steep hill that I had to conquer in order to reach Granny-Darla’s home, I chose to believe that the vleiloeries I had heard were completing each other’s song. Not competing.

Completing the Comrades marathon.

It makes me think of the Comrades marathon, where one often sees athletes set aside their own goals in order to help a fellow runner, dust them off, walk or jog alongside them, sometimes even carry them – helping them to complete their race. Sheryl had first-hand experience of this when she struggled to complete the Comrades a few years back. Which brings me to another story. A story which features, amongst other things, an account of one of the traumatic but defining moments Sheryl endured while trying to complete the Comrades.

Unbridling … a part of our story nears completion

Over the past few years, Sheryl and I have penned a book that is soon to be launched. Unbridling is a co-authored memoir in which we share a journey that unravels the upheaval of emotions Sheryl endured from a young age after being diagnosed as a hemiplege. Parallel to this runs my own journey – a mother’s fear and uncertainty raising a daughter who was, according to her diagnosis and label, disabled. Along the way, one of the things we learned was that life is more about completing than competing. And yes – we do sometimes finish each other’s sentences.

Final stage of completion

We are so excited that the book is in the final stage of completion. It is at the printers and will be launched early in 2026. One of the events we have been invited to, is the Cape Flats Book festival… advertised in the featured image. If you are in the area – we’d love to see you there. Watch this space for news of our other events in 2026.

Sheryl’s take on this exciting part of our journey: “I’m thankful to all who played their part in writing and editing this book. I’m excited that it’s on the verge of being released.”